Website Update!

I have been able tonight to get to some easier problems and goals on my photo website and updates can now be seen.  Click here to see and enjoy...

 

www.hiddenlightphotography.com

 

I mainly have added a new gallery, and a rotating home page.  These aren't huge but seem so because of the work load with school I have been dealing with...so I am excited...

 

Included as well is a change of address on my blog for my photography site.  It is at this address now...

 

www.hiddenlightphotography.com/blog

 

Enjoy!

Words...

So lately Zach is a walking dictionary.  This is no joke.  Yesterday alone he picked so many words.  One was Juice, and another M&M.  Not teasing he knows M&M quite well. 

He is also going non stop.  He does things all day long.  He still takes naps but is going constantly when awake.  This is why people have a hard time being a single parents.  If I was single I would probably kill my child.  He might just drive me nuts. 

Him having more energy and direction is fun too.  I chased him around the house for more than an hour yesterday.  Andrea (our 1 month old) was being held by me most of the time and she just fell asleep.  To much action for her.  It is good being a father.

Zach's other new word I can remember is Diaper.  He definitly likes to change her diaper.  He will have us do it 5 times in a minute.  He sees her as part of the family, but still doesn't realize that other people think for themselves...oh well.  He isn't even two yet!

Kid advice from Prolific Parenting by Alison

September 13, 2007

 

Dear Chris,

 

Today I am feeling very prolific; I want to write a book entitled "What I've Learned While Raising Two Children." Either that or "How I Stayed Sane While Raising My Children." 

 

To demonstrate my prolific-ness I shall now regale you with an excerpt of my future and, as yet, unwritten book:

 

"Today I learned that the best way to feed my son lunch is to fix what I want to eat. That way, when (notice I don't use the word "if") he refuses to eat it, I remain calm. The food won't go to waste! It won't even reenter the refrigerator in the ubiquitous Tupperware.  I eat lunch #1 while offering an assortment of other options to him. By the end of this multiple choice meal, there is generally a full tummy and a happy mom.

 

Multiple choice meals were a new concept to me.  BMC (before my children) I labored under the strong delusion that my children would eat whatever I put in front of them, if they got hungry enough. This is not so. Stubborn streaks seem to increase exponentially. I cooked meals, Zach refused to eat them, and the doctor seriously considered running tests to see why my child fell under the growth chart curve for his height. 

 

Actually, I don't believe Zach refused to eat simply out of obstinacy. While raising my children, I've come to realize how much children need to learn; all the little things we take for granted. Hence, we know hunger pains indicate a need to eat. Little kids haven't made that connection.

 

This new concept was substantiated on another occasion. My husband and I were enjoying the fall colors in Zion's National Park when Zach was only one. We stopped near the river for a picnic. Zach loves the water and it wasn't long before he was trying to crawl in. We, as parents feeling that experience is the best teacher, let him get a little wet because we figured that as soon as he felt the cold water, he'd want out. This was not so. He loved it! He wanted to crawl/ swim and we let him. Obviously he would get out when he got too cold, that's what normal people do when they get cold. Unfortunately, obviously, little babies don't have this higher level of reasoning. He shivered and his lips turned blue, and much to his chagrin we pulled him out. Oh how angry he was! He hadn't figured out the simple truth that when the water's cold, you should get out."

 

Well Chris, what do you think? Obviously it needs some polishing, but one day I might decide to publish.

 

Anyway, my day's been good. I accomplished my four mile walk! Wow. Maybe that's why I'm feeling so ambitious. After a feat like that, I feel I can conquer the world! (After laying down for a little rest, of course). I'm glad I was able to do what I set out to do. It's nice though, the hardest part of the walk is the first mile. After that the rest is pretty well flat. Next time I'm definitely taking my Ipod. Four miles is a long time to let my mind wander.  It's definitely going to get me in shape for our hikes!

 

I'm not so sure about the Ultimate Baby Wrap. After the first mile and a half Andrea had slipped down so low that I felt like I was giving birth again! I'll admit that this could be because I kept trying to adjust it, but in my defense it looks like it's hurting her head or neck. I guess I just need to become "ONE" with the baby carrier.

 

We had fun playing at the park. Oh, something else I've learned while raising my kids today, Zach has more fun at the park when I'm playing with him. Actually I learned this yesterday when I saw this grandpa playing at the park with his granddaughter. He even went down the slide with her! How cool is that? So I chased him around and pushed him on the swing set. Side note: It's fun jumping out of the swing since they have that bouncy stuff lining the playground.    

 

Zach has been adorable today. He's just wanted to do everything I'm doing. When I put baby lotion on Laura, he wanted it on him. (And later he actually climbed onto the changing table to get it out again. How can we keep him from climbing on that?) And later while I was practicing the piano he sat down on the piano bench right next to me and played just like I was. You know how the song (John Schmidt's "All of Me") has parts where you pound the keys with your elbow? Well Zach was doing that too!

 

Zach's also been carrying your scripture case around all day (he even took it to bed with him!) Don't worry, I replaced your scriptures with his books. Oh, other random story…I asked Zach if he was ready for a nap and in answer he ran into his room, climbed onto the couch, and into his crib. Well almost. His body was curled around the top of the bars. If he'd swung his legs up he'd have fallen straight in (on his head). I guess it's time to seriously get serious about relocating him to the toddler bed. Hmmm….Dread dread dread.

 

Oh, the funny part of this story though, once in the crib for his nap, he starts crying! It's like he was so excited about communicating with me, that he forgot what taking a nap really means. Either that or crying really is part of the bedtime routine. Hmmm….

 

One last parenting "Ahah!" before I let you go. I can't believe how fast Zach's picking up words now. The other day, suddenly it was "DOOR." Today at lunch he looked at me and clearly repeated the word "JUICE." (I'd asked him if he wanted to drink the bean juice). It's scary fast and random he picks up our words. We really have to be careful what we're saying eh?

 

Anyway, I'm off to dream about our Texas trip and take a shower. Well, first I better feed Laura. She's starting to root rather noisily.

 

I love you,

 

Ali

A fool day's work...

hey Chris dear,

 

how is your full day's work going? Can you believe that you've already been at it six hours?  I bet you've wondered once or twice what your family has been up to since you left on your noble steed. Well, this brings me to the pun in the subject box. I've been fooled out of what I wanted done today. Pictures. Your mother got my hopes up for a professional photo featuring our adorable children....well, our children team up and fooled the photographers out of a customer. I actually couldn't see why they were having problems with Laura-she was fed and happy. I guess they wanted her to hold her head up and she didn't feel like complying. Zach on the other hand...he was NOT going to go sit on that box to have his picture taken. Arg. I guess he feels loyal to his dad and doesn't want any stranger taking his picture. In a month or so I'll take Andi over to Olan Mills. She should be able to hold her head up by then...

 

You're probably wondering about the doctor's visit. Well, all is well...the VSD is getting smaller and they did a blood test on her to see how stressed her heart is. Apparently the harder the heart works the more something-something is in the blood. any number between 0-100 is normal. Hers is 32. Excellent eh? He wants to see us back in a month. So the appointment is for Oct 12 at 9:30. When were we going to the Tetons again? That is something I'll definitely reschedule for.

 

And that's all I've accomplished today...oh yeah, and Zach's lunch...that's it...

 

I love you...

 

Ali

Butter...yum?

Okay here is yet another crazy thing my child has taken up.  This one is handled directly by Zachariah.  We were at a church dinner/party and he wasn't really excited about much of any of the food.  He was being a typical almost two year old.  When they brought dessert out he was an excited boy.  But that doesn't compare to what he had up his sleeve for his next move.

When the dessert was not fun any more he decide to see what was in the cute squares...they were of coarse butter.  Well we thought let him see what it is and the he will be all done with it.  That wasn't the case.  We opened it for him to see and he popped it right into his mouth. 

Well one wasn't quite enough so let me tell you he was up to table opening more packets and just eating strait butter.  It was wild.  We stopped in at three servings of butter and he was pretty mad that we drew the line there. 

I just honestly never know what to expect from my children.  They are amazing to say the least.  Maybe the funnest thing about them is that they will always change so fast on you.  About two weeks ago Zachariah completely changed the word set he had been using.  So now we don't know what any of the sounds he is making mean.  The joys of life.

They Know what they want!

Our daughter is now almost three weeks old. I can hardly believe that it has gone so fast. Her personality is already showing through big time. Here is what she does that is just amazing to me.

Since she has been home about a week she has started to insist that we hold her when we are near. By near I mean that she is able to tell that your close or by her. They can't really see that well at first from what I can tell and from what I have read. Despite this she really wants us to be close and hold her when she can tell we are by her. When we aren't within a range that she can tell we are nearby she really doesn't have much care to be held in general. This blows me away. Already at 19 days old my daughter Andrea is vying for attention.

My children never cease to amaze me.

The other thing that my daughter has recently started to do is she will track with her eyes. She will follow our voices and faces with he eyes, even struggling to move her little head to follow us further.

Again I must say I am quite amazed, even though I saw it all with my son Zach before. Wow. Being a parent is rewarding to say the least.

Time Outs!

Well For me a big thing that helps me to be a better person and father is to take time outs. Some times it isn't just the kids that need them. It is the adults to.

Tonight my kid was so tired and as a matter of fact quite cranky if he didn't get everything he wants, and precisely how. We made him a snack for before he went to bed and that back fired. He threw it on the floor twice and then basically tried to do it again. I swatted him and realized that I was really tired and exasperated and need to stop the course of this interaction or my actions may get regretful. Having two unreasonable people interacting at once is a not a productive thing. So we took a time out and he was still unreasonable but I was at least in control again and things went passably before we put him to bed. The product of all this was he went to bed tired and a bit sad that he had to go to bed, but didn't go to bed afraid and mad at me or worse both of us parents.

So take a time out so that you can breath...they will not repair quickly and usually will get worse fast as actions aren't positive in their direction.

Extreme Emotion!

It is interesting how kids can go from extreme to extreme in a moment. This I believe is because they can hardly tell the difference from happy and mad. They are not opposite but much closer together.

I can get my kid riled up and giggling at almost anything pretty easy and it is hilarious. Well sometimes he will be happy and then just burst out in anger and madness. When they get pushed to the extreme they basically lose all composure and control. For me this helps me to understand why they can be so shift in moods.

So I think as parents we can realize that this happens and help to control them and their emotions for theirs and our benefit.

Communication

One evening I was alone with my son and my wife was out with friends at a womens group. My son and I were having a lot of fun and things were going well. At some point he started being quite fussy. I tried what I thought was everything. Foods, toys whatever came to mind.

He was getting worse and worse to the point that nothing was okay. I must interject that at about 1 year we decided discipline would be started, no more fits or things would be tolerated. So after trying for 30 minutes to mollify my child I spanked him and gave him a time out for a few minutes for him to calm down and for me to calm down.

When he got up he was still fussy. To the point that he was hitting me in the face. This has only happened on a few occasions. He just doesn't have that disposition. So I spank him again and more time out. Well when I got him up again I tried to understand what was wrong and went through the regular list; food, water, toys, comfort, diaper...well it turned out that unless you took off his diaper and inspected rather than the peek down the back the issue would not be discovered. He had been sitting in a bit of his own waste for hours and was extremely inflamed/red/rash to the point that touching, holding or anything near caused him extreme agony.

At this point I feel like I have failed in life. I clean him up and put some ointment on it and take care of the issue. I should have realized or learned from that point on that he was trying to tell me he had a problem, not just being fussy. Even though he could only cry at point he had different ones for frustrated, hurting, and angry.

I failed to understand what he was trying to tell me (luckily he still loved me) for over an hour. He both deteriorated to not really being kind and things fell apart on us.

At this point I think that I began to have a desire to really right this book that had come to mind earlier before he was born.

In the Beginning...

It is interesting to look back and realize that I have been a father now for almost 2 years. My little offspring has learned and grown quite fast. He know walks and talks. If that wasn't enough he also is mastering emotion. His favorite is ownership and showing us he isn't happy.

The most recent example of his displaying that he isn't happy came when last night he started hitting his mother and pulling her hair. We realized that he was doing this because he wanted her to play with him and not be laying down. He apparently doesn't like her to lay down because he thinks that all energy and effort should be given to him. Never mind that she is going to be having our second child at any moment and is incredibly uncomfortable.

He definetely likes to control us and what we do, he always like to get what he wants and more so to feel like he controls what is going on in his life. I can't blame him I try to do the same thing but in different ways now that I have learned that direct control of people like he tries isn't really something that works well.